…the last day of your first adult job
Hmmm…Would I have been an adult at 18? lol okay okay…I’m stalling.
I was 18 and I worked at the United States Postal Service. My mom got me the job (she’d worked there since the day I was born) so this meant I had to be on my best model daughter behavior. I could do no wrong…or at least not get CAUGHT doing no wrong.
Well, that is HARD when you’re a Narcoleptic, but don’t KNOW you’re a Narcoleptic so you just look…*wait for it*…LAZY! So…that meant I was walking on eggshells trying not to go to sleep. Trying not to fall asleep while running the OCR machine, or while sorting mail, or while pushing the “post cons” (which look like rolling jails for mail) LOL
I had fun sometimes…I knew a few of the workers around my age. My friend Catina (who shares a birthday with me), my friend Shaunta, Mia and a frenemy, Debbie. I had a crush on the older brother of someone I went to school with but that died shortly thereafter because he was an asshole who thought he could tell me how if I “sculpted my body a little more I could have a BAD ASS shape”. Man fuck you and the thoughts you’re thinking…
Anyway…
The last day of this job was following a fight I almost had a week before with an OLD ASS WOMAN!! This woman used to bother me all of the time. I have NO clue why. I always respected my elders and often deferred to them with a passive, “Yes ma’am” or “Excuse me, Ma’am”. WHY this crazy ass old hen felt the need to bother me was beyond me. She actually confronted me in the bathroom because she’d heard me say under my breath something about how she needed to back up off me. (I had only the intentions of going home and speaking to my mother about it and having her handle it for me, since this was a TEMP job and she’d been there for 18yrs) I’d had E-FUCKING-NOUGH of Rogue Gangster Granny acting like I stole her Ben-Gay. So, she followed me and said, “What you say, bitch?” I was like O_O …the fuck? is WRONG? with THIS OLD BISH???
Well, this chick was COCK-A-DOODLE DOO crazy. She pulled out a KNIFE on me. My friend Catina was like, “OMG…she’s gonna KILL YOU!” LOL I told her not to worry about it. She tried to jab at me and I dodged her. (I was pretty fast since childhood) She tried to jab me again and I caught her hand and pushed her with my weight. I ran the HEYELL up outta that bathroom and to the supervisor’s office. I reported her and within the week…I had been terminated.
Nope…it wasn’t because of the old lady debacle. It ended up being about the fact that I was late more than a few times (I worked from 11pm to 7am and it was hard to get up and out of the house) AND I’d been caught napping more than few times around the P.O. (damn looking ass negroes) LOL
I lost that job in Early November of 1991 and by 1992 I would begin work at NYNEX (now Verizon) for almost two years. I’d get terminated from that job for the same reasons…
I got diagnosed a month after leaving that job in 1994 and found myself being able to FINALLY put a name to what was “wrong” with me. Severe Narcolepsy.
The Kween's Kaleidoscope 