Fairy tales…the stuff kid’s dreams and consequently…some nightmares..are made of. Growing up I had a set of Childcraft books, which beheld hundreds of nursery rhymes and stories. I remember well singing Frere Jacques and a story called Molly the Little Homemaker about a little girl who loved to play mom and clean. So much like ME, that my Uncle Kenny calls me Molly to this day…but HOLE up. Yea, I said “HOLE” up…what are we teaching our kids? Is this stuff healthy? I don’t know how I feel about a child of mine singing things (repetitively) that are so “off” in concept.
So anyway, last night I was on the phone and began singing Rock-a-bye baby (to myself)…when something came over me. So I asked my baby, “What the hell kinda madness is that? Is that not horrible?”. He agreed and we sat there coming up with other nursery rhymes that were horrible…or stupid. First, though…I had to look up where the rock-a-bye song came from…because that’s some craziness. Put your baby in a tree? On some weak ass “bough” aka limb…and leave him/her there to fall? Poor baby. Is that were SIDS began? The hell kinda song? Come to find out…it was a Native American thing that Indian mothers did. Placing their kids in an ornate wooden cradle…on limbs, and allowing the wind to rock the baby gently to sleep. The visiting Europeans, coined the song by observation. Interesting, huh?
I even found out that “Humpty” was indeed NOT an omelet…but a cannon mounted on a church’s wall in England, that suffered injury after a battle where the church’s wall was struck, leaving the cannon in pieces. Guess they couldn’t put it back together again…made a song about it. Wanna hear it? Here it go…LOL
Then I was wondering about who was smoking hash and came up with “Hey Diddle Diddle…the cat and the fiddle…the cow jumped over the moon” and some other crackhead mess about some cutlery making off into the night. WHO came up with that and why? SO…again I go…researching this stuff…all to find out this some code crap for some hanky panky about Queen Elizabeth. Just crazy. Read this stuff…*smh*
But, what about some of the “grimmer” tales…not the nursery rhymes, sung in nonsensical whim…but the stories that were read to us based on horrific happenings. Like Little Red Riding Hood, the victim of a drive-by wolfing. (Peep how they call it “Little Red Cap”. Or Rumpelstiltskin, where a lil dude basically does a “Fat Bastard” and wants the Queen’s baby instead of her munny. lol. Let’s not forget Hansel and Gretel…where a cannibalistic witch, who likes to eat babies, holds a boy hostage, force-feeding him, poking him over and over to test his tenderness…all so she could throw his thick ass in the oven. WTF? Yea, GRIMM, huh? And what is this running theme of old lonely chicks and men wanting to take someone’s first born in exchange for whatever? Yea…these stories are crazy as hell…but, I guess the truth is that the point is to take you to another place. Where the story itself is unbelievable, yet beholds a sort of magical hope that things will turn out okay in the end. Gotta tell you though…them Grimm boys must’ve had a hell of a time getting dates. Just too damn creepy for their own good.