Word 24: Fire

Fire…

I love fire.

As a kid, fire brought curiosity that nothing else did…besides maybe water. With fire…there was this beautiful, glowing, sign of heated life and it could grow. It could be bigger than a candle’s flame and be angrier than any person’s temper.

My first lesson on fire, was when I was a kid of about 7 or 8 and I lit a fire to my grandmother’s shag rug…just to see it burn. Unfortunately, my baby sister’s stroller was there. I KNOW what you’re thinking, but I promise it wasn’t intended to set HER on fire. I was playing carelessly and too young to know how quickly a rug made of synthetic fibers could burst into flames. I was chided harshly (deserving), but I could never shake that suspicion that I would harm my sister purposefully.

I still have a secret love affair with fire. There’s something about the colors that burning oxygen gives off to the naked eye…an involuntary pull to be swallowed by it, and hopefully…an 11th hour sense of self-preservation that keeps you from falling in.

The Twenty Fourth Day…

…a memorable summer day

In 2005 we had our family reunion in Myrtle Beach, SC. (Yes, it’s another family reunion recollection, but not really lol)

Well, in preparation…I had to look RIGHT. I needed to be cute. Sis and I had shopped for clothes, sandals, etc…but, the most important part of that ritual…is the hair.

Two weeks prior to the reunion, I’d colored my hair…a light brownish/blondish color. My hair is so dark with red undertones, so most colors in that blonde family come out “strawberry blonde”. Cool, no problem. Light is good…

The night before leaving…I got a relaxer. “They” say you can process after two weeks of adding color (or vice versa if you relax first then color). I felt safe. Clearly….I was not.

My mom (a cosmetologist) put the relaxer in and we washed it out like we normally would. No problem there…until I went to blow dry it.

“Mommy…I think my hair is falling out…”

She sat me in the chair and checked on it. I asked, “Is everything okay?” and my mother said convincingly, “Yea, it’s fine…it’s not a lot of hair…just a little.” In the meantime…she was behind me like “OMG!” because my hair was falling out in clumps. She didn’t want me to see how much was breaking off. She combed through it gingerly and then told me not to apply heat. To let it air dry. She then showed me the hair on the floor and I was like : O!

My mother assured me that my hair would be fine…thank GOD that I have a LOT of hair. She told me that if I’d been the average person…I’d be bald. Thankfully, it had only fallen out around the edges…well, it was broken off an inch from my scalp. I never did THAT shit again. I have some strong ass hair. Sheesh.

The next day down in Myrtle Beach, my hair got it’s life. I curled it and it came out fine. The above pic is my hair after the color began to fade.

I had another incident with my hair…read “Hurr Afire“. LOL

24~ I Apologize

Have you broken anyone’s heart?

I don’t know. I really don’t. I’ve always been on the receiving end of bullshit. I didn’t take time out in my busy moments of dusting off the fuckas of past to see if someone’s heart got broken by me.

Anything is possible. Someone is probably swearing I did that shit to them. If so, I apologize. I go into each situation with an open heart and honesty. If I don’t like/love you…I don’t waste my time or yours. I don’t tell folks I love them and then go tell the next person that’s it’s all about them. I get no pleasures in gaming with folks’ hearts and lives.

Having said that…it’s quite possible that IN my honesty of, “No, I don’t see you that way…” that someone’s feelings could’ve gotten hurt. I think hurt feelings are a world away from a broken heart, but I can’t determine the scope of someone else’s disappointment, either.

To end this…I’ll post my FAVORITE song for this kind of occasion. I heard it some months back and it’s been in heavy rotation since.

“Message To You” by Claudette Ortiz…if I’ve every hurt you or broken your heart, I apologize…

Dia Viente y Cuatro~ Make A Playlist To Someone…


…and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)


This is SO hard. There are like SO many people whom I have a musical history with. Friends, family, loves. This is almost unfair to ask me to narrow it down to one absolute person. I think I’m gonna go with my 1st love. The reason being is because for all intents and purposes…this dude (as well as my dad) help to imprint the love of music into me. We did duets all of the time, singing and vibing off music. To this day, this dude and I are still cool. THAT is the reason I can rock this playlist. We’re over each other but love each other just the same. We don’t kick it (which is best for all involved) because our energy is overwhelming and could shut out everyone in the room. We don’t mean it…it’s just who we be! 2B & 2E friends forever!


So here it goes…


Dearest First (Anonymity is best, lol):


~Let’s Chill by Guy~ A song that no matter WHO I’m loving still reminds me of you and makes me want to chill with you (as friends) LOL


~Giving My All To You by Johnny Gill~ Man. I can’t stand you dude! To this DAY whenever I sing this song and get to this part, I sing it the way you did…”I’m just waiting for you, Kali…come to me” LMAO Even though I know GOOD and damn well, it’s BABY…not Kali. Too funny! (Who ELSE’S name did you interchange with baby…damn Romeo) LOL


~I Care by Tony Toni Tone’~ I can hear you AND see you singing this…I’m so glad we cool as hell or I’d have to marry you. LMAO


~Let Me Be Your Angel by Stacy Lattisaw~ This is the first song you ever heard me sing and realized I COULD sing.


~Secret Lovers by Atlantic Starr~ No comments. LMAO


~Always by Atlantic Starr~ I just think that our voices went perfectly with their sound then. We tore this down every time we sung it.


~Ready Or Not by After 7~ Remember how you’d take the low lead and I’d take the falsetto lead?


~Thriller by Michael Jackson~ YES…the WHOLE album. We sung the hell out of this it!


~Center Of My Joy by Richard Smallwood~ He probably doesn’t even remember that I smuggled my mother’s album out of the house so he could hear this…see what a girl does for love? LOL


~All I Want Is Forever by Regina Belle & James Taylor~ Another duet we couldn’t resist


~Purple Rain by Prince~ Yes…again….the whole album. We watched this movie ad nauseum, so we sang those songs until we got told to shut it by your mother. lol


~Adore by Prince~ Always and forever this will bring me back to one of the first times we “did it”. Barely 14…but forever connected with you…AND Prince!


~I Wanna Rock With You by Bobby Brown~ I can see you tryna rock with me. *giggling*


~Perfect Combination by J. Gill & S. Lattisaw~ Come on…we’re the king and kween of duets! LOL


~Where Do We Go From Here? by S. Lattisaw & J. Gill~ WHAT? O_o LOL


~Vanishing by Mariah Carey~ One of my solos you loved 🙂


~Tears of Joy by Karyn White~ I can see you sitting intently at my dining room table as you listened to me sing it with my eyes closed 🙂


Look, I could do this all day with so many songs from several eras…truth is…this cat and I sat and sang EVERY day in some way. We were bonded through music and knowledge. We’re each other’s blueprint for what it is we seek in people. That need to be able to enjoy music and have great conversation between sexual peaks is something that is a pertinent building block of a relationship.


I hope if he ever reads this…he’ll be able to go backwards with me and enjoy the trip.


Love Always, “Pekoe Light” LOL