The Twenty Ninth Day…

taken today 3-29-13

…what you were doing today

You know…the next time I make a challenge I’m going to have to remember NOT to repeat myself. Even though the other day’s was an average day in your life and this one is what happened THIS day, it’s still too close for comfort.


Today was my last day in physical therapy for my knee. It’s still not at 100% but, it’s coming along. There’s still tightness when bent and going up and down stairs is a challenge, but I’m hoping that with more exercise it will increase mobility. It just don’t make NO sense that I can tell when the rain and snow’s a-coming. lol

Tonight is movie night for me. I’ll be watching two (maybe three) flicks. One is an Eastern love story called “Kama Sutra: A Tale of Love“. I saw it a while back, in late 1997 or 98. I love to watch movies with rich story lines or something that requires me to step out of my comfort zone. It’s subtitled (I think), but hey…so was “Like Water for Chocolate” and I love that movie.

The next is a movie I actually have in my possession called “Perfume: The Story of a Murderer“. I’m not even sure why I’m watching it again since it kinda creep’d me out the first time, but hey…entertainment is required tonight. I need to get my mind in a zone and movies and music do it for me.

The third movie is the last movie in the Twilight saga “Breaking Dawn Pt. 2” I ain’t linking you because you should know what that is.

So that’s it my friends. My boring Friday.

Maybe there’s hope for tomorrow and I can get out to see Tyler Perry’s “Temptation”.

Le Birstay Blog

HOLA!! How’s everyone?

I know, I know…I’m soooo off this blogging game. I think it became sorta kinda tainted when they started making money off of it…before that, blogging was an art and was fun. Now, it’s about capitalism and we all know what happens once an art gets exploited…but, I digress…big time. LOL

My BIRTHDAY! Right! 🙂

I turned 40 on January 10th. I’d been super excited for my birthday. I’m ALWAYS excited about my birthday. I love birthdays…mine and everyone’s around me. I normally just chillax on my day and soak up my own personal “New Year”. I dig a peaceful existence, so I’m just fine w/the meal of my choice and a little sippy sip while sitting in front of the TV. lol

NOT this year though. I wanted to share my day with some special people…friends…ladies, who’d been there for me. People who have been on some part of my journey. It’s goes without saying that my baby sis has been there the longest, but she’s far from being the only one to be in my life…giving love, support and true friendship. My girl Joy has been quite the sister, too. She helped me organize this little kween affair and did a lot of running around to ensure that all of those involved were either safely arrived, comfortable or accounted for.

Joy & Kiwi
Our friend Tina came in from Maryland to visit…
See, it started out as a mere visit. Tina wanted to come earlier in December, but the planning (along with the pressures of the upcoming Christmas season) was a bit much. I suggested she come at a later date and immediately, my birthday popped into my head. She, Joy and I would hang out and do fun things AND celebrate my milestone birthday. LEGGO!
Kiwi & Tina
Before long…this plan turned into what I called, “Kween’s Kick-Ass 40th Birthday Weekend”. Originally, the plan was to see Times Square and show Tina the town, but as time passed things changed. One of the biggest was my injury. I somehow happened upon a meniscus tear and was given an immobilizer with crutches. I couldn’t have been more bummed. I had SO much to do to prepare for this weekend and not enough get-up-and-go. 
Somehow…SOME way…the more important details came together. I may not have gotten my nails done, or had the necklace I wanted or been able to stroll Times Square, but I had friends and family who loved me and wanted to bring in my 40th year breaking bread in my honor.
Meeting Tina was the highlight of the weekend. As happy as I was to see all of my lovely sisters/sistars/sistas…this one was special. Once again, I got to meet someone who’d earned a piece of my friendship heart from afar. TIna is as sweet and loving as I thought her to be PLUS more. The energy this woman emanates is nothing less than a positive aura with the glow of a crown. She’s easy-going, but don’t take NO shit…my kinda girl. lol Having her there was very special.
…but, so is my entire sista circle. 🙂
My baby sister (and twin by six years) came and brought along our godson’s mom, Aly…my baby sister from another. I knew she’d come, but didn’t know she’d come…but, knew she’d come. LOL It’s hard to explain. Just know that I was glad to see shawty roll up in what had to be 5″ heels…tryna be taller than me. lol
Monifa, Kiwi & Aly
My sistars Chante & Caprice showed…which was a given. These ladies just hop on trains and beat a path. lol …it’s always too long between visits…but, it’s good to know that there are folks in your circle where the love remains the same no matter HOW long it’s been since the last hug.
Caprice & Chante

Speaking of a LONG time between visits…my friend Vikki and I hadn’t seen each other since my grandmother died. That’s almost three years ago. It’s amazing how “life” gets in the way and time continues to expand between people. The thing is…that regardless of how long it had been, when thinking of those I wanted to share in my day with me…she was definitely one of them. I was happy to see her and grateful that she took the time out of her non-stop busy life to come out.
Kiwi & Vikki
My cousin Felicia showed up, too! I actually just met her in December and wanted to make sure that we used every opportunity to hang out. She blended right in and I was tickled by her ease with my friends. 
Felicia & Monifa
Dinner was at the Havana Cafe, a suggestion by Caprice. The food was good…the ambiance was nice as well. We had a momentary run-in with a rude hostess, but all was remedied and the night went smooth afterward. I mean, what do you expect? She had that Latina fire…but, I gotta little Rican in me so THERE!! LOL 
Havana fare…
Joy got my cake from “Make My Cake” in Harlem. Red velvet…and good!
I have to say…not all who were invited…made it. My girl DeAnna aka Deedles…couldn’t make it. Crazier thing…even thought it’s not WHY she couldn’t make it…she, too had a knee injury that required an immobilizer. 
My girl Maria couldn’t make it on such short notice. We both pouted about it, but she kept telling me to have fun for her. I tried. lol I may not have poured some licka out for her…but, I definitely made my drink strong in her honor. LOL
My girl, Tei was sidelined too…I swear, it seems all my closest friends of the heart…live the furthest from me. That’s the down side to finding friendships in cyberspace. The distance is a killer of party dreams.
Gina…a close friend of Tina’s and mine…was thisclose to coming, but couldn’t. She was sorely missed with the rest of the absentee ladies.
My LOCAL girls, Ayanna and Renee missed the festivities as well. In spite of living in the vicinity, the two ladies had last minute issues that kept them away. We’re gonna plan an outing soon though. I mean, my birthday celebration ain’t over. I think 40 DESERVES a whole month of recognition…don’t you think? 
I spent my ACTUAL day with the lady who brought me in the world. We had a simple lunch of pizza and she helped me get a couple of errands done for the weekend. I got cool cards and gifts and I felt like a spoiled little diva. lol …what more could you ask for?
I had a wonderful weekend…and I just pray that God blesses me with an equally stellar year. How about that…I COULD ask for more.
Love you…fa weel doe. 😉

I O U…

Sorry that I short-changed you guys yesterday…I had a full Friday. I went from work to the Bronx to meet up with my girl Joy, so we could go to Manhattan. Our friend Celeste’s belated birthday dinner was at Dallas BBQ’s. Since Celeste moved to Georgia last year, we’ve barely seen her. This was actually my first time seeing her since her move. It was great to see her…very brief, yet a very cool “butterfly” weekend.

We enjoyed ourselves immensely…taking pics, eating, and laughing. After dinner, Joy and I made our way back to her place in the BX and made a bee line for the bed. Today, I attended a cotillion for “Golden Divas”…a group of cherished ladies in their Golden Years. It was a beautiful dedication to four ladies who have been active in the community and church. This gala took place at my grandmother’s church and was put upon very nicely. There was a musical/dance selection that had me on the verge of tears. An older woman of 50+ did a wonderful interpretive dance to Maya Angelou’s poem, “Phenomenal Woman”. She was so very graceful and expressive. I was impressed.  The débutante danced with their escorts.  Here’s a quick view of them dancing:

I was so tired. I hit the ground running Friday morning and didn’t stop until I reached my room going on 7pm.

Do you think I lied down? Nope. Still up…fighting sleep like a baby. I hate that yesterday’s blog escaped me. It was unavoidable though. Since I didn’t have the good sense to actually write it BEFORE leaving…fitting in time to write was damn near impossible.

So, here I am…writing as the clock turns 12am (actually going into a THIRD day of non-blog).  I had to post SOMETHING. My mind is too tired to give a damn about how lengthy and substantial this thing is. At least I gave you pics. LOL

Here’s another. I took this on my way to the Bronx on the train. One of my faves. Good night 🙂

The Truth of Trust

A few weekends ago I had a ball. A friend of a friend who is now my friend, flew in from Detroit. She’s been by association a cool person to e-know, but this particular weekend I had the pleasure of making her acquaintance. Diva, as she is known online came through to celebrate her birthday here in NY, so we (myself and our mutual friend) tried to make her feel as welcome as possible.

Between dinners, breakfast, drinks, the MAC store and picture taking…we had fun. What I liked the most was the ability for 3 totally different women with totally different backgrounds/upbringings…to be absolutely drama-free and trusting enough to forge a bond. Not only did I learn a lot about my new friend…I learned about myself as well. Nothing TOO bad *wink*…lol…just a reaffirming of some cool qualities that I wasn’t sure about before. YEP…even the kween has stumbled. *gasp…I KNOW right?* No, for real…people tend to get an image of me in their head as the good girl…and though it is majorly true…it’s not all I am. I try consciously everyday to be a better me. I try to be forthcoming and genuine in my relationships with others and pride myself on being honorable about intentions and behavior…yet I too, tend to walk a fine line of doing right and wrong. Talking to these two ladies (by the way, their names are Joy & Tracey)…made me realize that growing isn’t just about moving forward…but it’s about change. It’s about transformation based on experience and application which equals wisdom. To have a meeting of the minds with people and know that you’re being looked at for the person you are and not what they want you to be is a good feeling…and that feeling is amplified, when typical Internet horror stories are debunked and true friendships are formed over this thing affectionately called cyberspace. That weekend, we TRUSTED each other. Trust can be a hard thing to establish on the Internet.

I have had a few bad experiences. From people pretending to be someone they’re not (figuratively and literally), to back-biting, dramatic females who aim to maim my reputation and character (without success)…to a few dating debacles. YET…in the four ACTIVE years of my e-life…I’ve managed to get WAY more positivity out of this place than not.

I found a forum for my writings…which helped to relieve me of a longtime fear to share my works. I found some of the best friends in the world. I found love. I found my voice…and at the same time…I didn’t lose that thing about myself that a lot of people tend to lose interacting online…my humanity. The ladies and I discussed how we have often heard so many people refer to the Internet as nothing but a source of entertainment. That statement used to get on my nerves because regardless of how easily you may turn of your computer (if some of these folks ever do) these are PEOPLE on the other side. You’re bound to be affected by something you’ve read. I have bonded emotionally and spiritually with people I’ve met and some I haven’t…so, I know it to be true. The antiquated thinking, that Internet folks are crazy…is really a false sense of security. You can meet crazy face-to-face and never know it. I met crazy…and he never entered a chat room, social site or barely an email. I’ve met women, who have as much drama in their lives, if not more OFFLINE than anywhere else. The people online ARE the people offline…just hidden and more anonymous. Drama wearing screen names and danger wearing smiley faces. Remove the computer and you still have threats to your sanity, peace of mind and physical life. More than anything it’s about learning how to trust your judgment and remembering that you too are flawed and have layers. No one is ever one thing 100% of the time. We fluctuate between the best of ourselves and the demons we’re fighting against…but, what is the best feeling in the world aside from love…is knowing that you’ve learned enough about life to catch yourself on or offline…making better decisions when inviting people into your life. What is invaluable as an adult…is to know that you’ve learned to trust YOURSELF. I say it all of the time when speaking on trust, “The person who trusts no one cant be trusted. Someone who trusts no one, doesn’t trust their own judgment…and therefore would sacrifice other’s feelings and lives in order to protect self.”  I stick by that…if you don’t believe it…think on the person who betrayed you and ask yourself in retrospect how much that person REALLY opened up to YOU. How many things did you find out AFTER the fact as opposed to being within the relationship. How many times were you openly and/or passively accused of committing betrayals you hadn’t…you will see.

That weekend, I met someone new…and it is a standing confirmation of what I’ve known for two years now…trusting others is as important as trusting yourself. If you don’t…you’ll miss out on new and exciting adventures that await a person willing to transform by way of life’s experiences rather than be crippled by fears. I’d rather trust and be betrayed, than be alone in my fear to trust.

Thanks for the lovely weekend ladies!

My Family Reunion 2009

This past weekend (7-30 to 8-2-09) was my family reunion. The Monroes got together in Fishkill, NY to commemorate the 18 children of Hector and Maggie Monroe. My great grandmother was their daughter, Katie, who had 9 of her own children and lived in Red Springs, NC. This year, the NY Committee hosted and decided to have it in a place that had a lot of resources. There was basic shopping, outlet shopping, a water park, movie theaters, bowling and plenty of places to eat outside of the hotel. Friday night was the “BBQ”, but since it rained…it was held inside. Saturday night was the banquet dinner, which included memorials for the 18 and other family members who have passed in the recent year or so. Sunday morning was our farewell breakfast…and of course the last day.

The onset of this reunion was tense to say the least. A lot of things threatened to go wrong. I guess that is the downfalls of any family…issues are certain to arise. One of the earlier snafu’s was the backing out of my uncle and his family over a 15yr long rivalry with my other uncle’s wife. *sigh* Sibling rivalry is REAL in the hood. LOL THEN…Friday, we almost didn’t get the reunion tees because the printer thought we wanted them to be ready Friday FOR Saturday, so he was lax in finishing them all…my aunt-in-law, uncle and grandmother were hours late to the BBQ because they had to wait for the shirts and drive the hour and change back up to the mountains. Actually, that story starts further back, because when we ordered them, the printer of the shirts said that my design wasn’t going to work on the tees. The tree was a picture of the African tree of life and I just added names and tinted it. As it was it would’ve been a 4 screen process, which would have been way out of our pricing range. I had to go to the print shop, sit down at that guy’s computer and work it so that he could lift the tree off the picture. Anyway, that took place and eventually we got it popping.

All in all, we had a great weekend. The feeling of being around your clan can be refreshing and tiring at the same time. I probably slept all of 8hrs TOTAL for the entirety of this weekend, which made for a very sleep kween. lol. That constant on-the-go of being in vacation mode is cool…so, it was worth every lost wink of sleep. I saw babies and toddlers and tweens and teens and my own crew and my mom’s crew and my grandma’s crew…which is scary. Scary to know because that means one day soon (but not TOO soon) my grandmother’s generation will be gone as well. That saddens me. Yet, it is the way the tide ebbs and flows. The children eventually ascend as more children beget descendants.

Here is a slide show of some of my favorite pictures from this past weekend. I love my family. Thank God for the Monroes 🙂

Kween Curvy Effect~The Weekend

Originally, we were supposed to meet up on the 12th of November, then it was the 22nd…because things kept happening. Life happens and things need to be prioritized accordingly. When we decided on the 6th of December, I was happy that we’d finally get to hang out. See, in the beginning…we just wanted to hook up and meet the people with whom we spoke to on a regular basis. No need for this to stay an “Internet Friendship” when we all lived in close enough proximity to see one another. Then, one person needed comfort…felt it would be a good way to give that support needed. Then the focus shifted onto another…and finally to me. I needed this like a booga wolf needs a shave. So, it was on. (Even though it almost got shifted to next week ONLY and I would’ve had to wait another weekend…THAT I wasn’t having! BRING YO ASSES)

I got up early, went to the train station about 10 to 8 in the morning. Got my round trip ticket for $11 from Peekskill to Bronx and waited. I almost got turned around at the transfer point, because they changed it, which changed the track I was supposed to be on. BE was like, “Do NOT get on the wrong train, I will be mad @ you Kiwi!” LOL Got on the train and before long I was in the Bronx. As SOON as I exited the train, I saw BE way down the platform waving and smiling! There should of been fields of flowers and a slo mo cam, so we could run to each other and hug. *LOL* Do you know the 1st thing she said to me? “Damn, Kiwi…you’re lighter than I thought you’d be!” Yep…that’s BE! We went to the street, nabbed a cab and got to her house…there, I met Albert/Bastum the cat.

BE made me breakfast. I had bacon, hash browns, eggs and coffee. We sat and talked, being entertained by some comedy and just got used to “seeing” the person we’d been chatting with for months.

Finally, Curvy Queen got there. She is too cute. Now, check it. BE is a diva. Chick was in the kitchen handling stuff all prissy (2 finger like). She’s got the HOT ass natural curly fro and she’s just a doll. Curvy is like a baby. She’s got the baby face, the baby voice and yea…she acts like one too. Curvy’s fave phrase? “Uh uuuh” *lol* BOTH of these chicks would NOT let the cat touch them. He got shooed, nudged with feet, looked @ funny! Poor Bastum. But, I digress. Once Ms CQ entered the building, we turned around and walked a block down to the liquor store. I flirted with a few people, including engaging in a staring contest with a dude walking past us. WHAT? He was staring so I returned the glare. I ended up choosing Disaronno & Sour mix for Amaretto Sours. (My Parrot Bay Pineapple Rum was unavailable) We stopped by Mickey D’s where I flirted, CQ harassed the register boy and his equipment and BE shook her head. *hehe*

We got into the house, changed clothes to lounge wear…and then ate. We talked some more and then relaxed. **DING DONG** Who da? What the? SAMURAI SOUL (BE’s baby boo) enters the building. *the crowd roars* Enter…the only man of the party. Well, time to mix the drinks. Hmmm, if I made 4 1/2 medium sized cups of drink…I drank 3. Hence the slanted eye in the pics. From there on, we were just enjoying the evening. I think the ladies were shocked at how much of a nut I am…but, they know now. I had a weak moment of tears and anger, but everyone…including BE’s baby boo, hugged me and made me feel good.

The next morning Curvy went home for church, and BE and I got dressed and headed to IHOP. Some dude flirted with me. He said to his friend, “She’s fine…” then says to me, “You’re so pretty with your butterfly earrings!” He then went to introducing himself and smiling at me the whole time. I turned pink. I guess BE thinks she cant take me NO damn where! LMAO I had to hide behind BE to keep that cat from staring a hole in my forehead. We finally ate and then went back to her place. I said goodbye to Albert/Bastum and we went to the train, but not before running to the 99cent store to pick up the TV tray I saw BE using for her laptop. We took a pic @ the station and then I got my happy ass on the train to Peekskill.

I had a wonderful time. BE was a BEAUTIFUL hostess and I enjoyed seeing her and Curvy and Samurai for the 1st time. It was so nice, we gone do it twice…next weekend!

**By the By…BE stands for Butterfly Effect and CQ stands for Curvy Queen. Gubment names were concealed to protect the not-so-innocent and the paranoid (*QQn @ CQ) LOL

The Weekend that Almost Wasn’t

I don’t make a big deal over holidays. I just dont. Especially these kind (Labor Day). I didn’t anticipate this weekend to be much different than any other. I figured…another weekend chilling. Not so…I actually had a good one.

Last night,I hung out for a bit with my godson’s parents. His mom Aly, is a sister/friend to me and my sister. She asked us to be godparents when Syre was born last year. We hadn’t seen them since Christmas, so this was a cool prelude to the 30 days I’m supposed to spend in DC helping Aly with Syre.

Aly and her fiance Chris are a couple of characters. First off, dude is wearing a cast on his hand that makes him look like he’s working a puppet! LOL He just had surgery on Friday. I am still trying to figure out how he drove a 4 1/2hr drive with his hand heavily bandaged. I guess its the same talent that got us to the supermarket safely in a haze of ganja smoke. LOL He can be a cool dude sometimes, but he has clearly influenced my girl to a point that keeps her from functioning outside their microcosm when he’s around. What probably irritated me tonight wasn’t that him and Aly were “lighting up”…but that they do it knowing their son (who is a preemie) has respitory problems. I dealt with it, but I really don’t like to be around that…having me smelling like an extra from a Cheech & Chong movie.

Other than that we had a ball. Up late at night while Aly made cupcakes (dude had like 8 plus 2 pieces of BBQ chicken). We laughed and made fun of Aly’s mom who I call the “Clean Nazi” She is fastidious to a fault. She has OCD personified. If Aly is cooking. she will come to the kitchen and hover. “Use that special cleanser for the glasstop…clean the oven well after use…make sure the cans are lined up by label in alphabetical order…” LMAO (ok, I was exaggerating that last one) But, I had to mock her. It was too funny.

Besides kicking it with Aly and Chris, on Saturday my 1st cousin who is moving back to NY after being in GA for over 3yrs…came through with my aunt. We (including my sister) went to dinner and ended up snapping pics outside the restaurant. We came home and attempted to watch a movie but ended up just enjoying each other’s company. I look forward to helping my cuzbro get situated after his move back.

I seriously didn’t think this weekend would happen. With Aly being so fickle about arriving, and my cousin being upset over some personal issues…I seriously didn’t expect this weekend to happen. So glad it did though. I wanna do it again.

Alabama or Bust

Well, I went on my trip to Alabama. I left NY’s Westchester Airport in White Plains around 6:30pm on June 20th, and made it to Alabama by 10:30 that night. Dionne’s Birthday Weekend was officially in progress.

Getting off the escalators after deplaning and seeing Mama and Dionne standing there was so cool. All those weeks of talking about it, planning and waiting…were no more. We were together finally.

Our weekend was too short. I felt like I could’ve stayed. Saturday we went to the cemetery to see Dionne’s sister. Before we got there…a car swerved out of control after it’s tire blew. It was a couple of cars in front of us, and had anyone hit it…we’d probably be laid up in a hospital or dead right now. Dionne was seriously shaken up, but we made it to the cemetery to do what we came for. We then went to eat at the China Buffet where Mama ended up in the corna twice, Dionne and I…once. LOL We’re too much. We then went to Birmingham’s Botanical Garden where we witnessed a wedding in progress. The bride’s gown was GORGEOUS! But, HELL if it wasn’t the quickest wedding we ever saw. LOL We took pics and then left to go back to the house.

The next day…we got up and went to a place called Scrubbs BBQ where Dionne’s dad had paid for some food to be picked up. We drove out there, where the place is basically a “house or shack” behind someone’s home, set up like a drive-thru. We took the food home and then went to a mall area called “Bridge Street” where Dionne had her ring fixed and we sat outside while Mama danced to a one man band’s strummings. Mama, Kasey and I put our feet in the fountain and then we left. I napped a little before getting up, eating and joining the family in a water gun fight. Dionne’s girls (Kasey,11 and Kennedy,5) were on Mama’s team…while Dionne’s son, Jordon, 13 was on the team with Dionne, her fiance’ Teddy, and me. We ALL got soaked head to toe. We ran around that yard spraying each other like we were crazy. The kids laughed with their Me Mah (their name for Mama) and were so happy.

Dionne opened her gift that Mama bought…a wireless keyboard and mouse. She received a Louis Vuitton purse the week before from our sister, Netty! (Which she rarely put down) Her “stepdaddy” bought her an amethyst ring…and I was just one big ole gift. LOL

Dionne taught me to drive that night. Yep, she knew that I had never learned because of my Narcolepsy, so she put me in the front seat and let me drive around her huge backyard, to the end of the driveway, backing into the yard again and parking the car finally. It was amazing. All I kept saying was, “I WANNA GO FAST!” LOL

Taking Mama to the airport the next morning was agony. We all cried like babies. Mama wouldn’t even let us stay…she shooed us off. Even after finding out that her flight was delayed for 2hrs, she wouldn’t let us turn around and sit with her. Dionne, the kids and I, were all sad, especially because we knew that it was my turn next.

I didn’t want to come home…but, I am sure that I will make a return trip to Alabama. Hopefully Mama and Dionne will be making a trip to the North come fall. Either way, I feel blessed to have them as family. I truly enjoyed myself. I have a home there.