Car…**I am aware that the pic is crazy as hell, but that’s how I’m feeling right now #djm lol*
Why when trying to find something to write about, the movie “Vanishing” came to mind. The one w/Keifer Sutherland, Sandra Bullock and crazy ass Jeff Bridges? I thought of how he spent an inordinate amount of his life, looking for his woman…replaying her last visit to their car over and over.
Then I thought of “Adam”…and how the real life story was played out on TV…the little boy who never came home…and how his parents left their car in the lot with a blanket and toys JUST in case he returned.
I thought of how many people get kidnapped from cars, jacked from cars…goodness. I must be in the mind of loss right now. I’ll quit typing.
|taken today 3-29-13
…what you were doing today
You know…the next time I make a challenge I’m going to have to remember NOT to repeat myself. Even though the other day’s was an average day in your life and this one is what happened THIS day, it’s still too close for comfort.
Today was my last day in physical therapy for my knee. It’s still not at 100% but, it’s coming along. There’s still tightness when bent and going up and down stairs is a challenge, but I’m hoping that with more exercise it will increase mobility. It just don’t make NO sense that I can tell when the rain and snow’s a-coming. lol
Tonight is movie night for me. I’ll be watching two (maybe three) flicks. One is an Eastern love story called “Kama Sutra: A Tale of Love“. I saw it a while back, in late 1997 or 98. I love to watch movies with rich story lines or something that requires me to step out of my comfort zone. It’s subtitled (I think), but hey…so was “Like Water for Chocolate” and I love that movie.
The next is a movie I actually have in my possession called “Perfume: The Story of a Murderer“. I’m not even sure why I’m watching it again since it kinda creep’d me out the first time, but hey…entertainment is required tonight. I need to get my mind in a zone and movies and music do it for me.
The third movie is the last movie in the Twilight saga “Breaking Dawn Pt. 2” I ain’t linking you because you should know what that is.
So that’s it my friends. My boring Friday.
Maybe there’s hope for tomorrow and I can get out to see Tyler Perry’s “Temptation”.
Write a Love letter to your soul mate (whether you feel you’ve met them or not)
This challenge is coming to a close. A lot of my challengers are going to take a huge sigh of relief. I got spoken of a LOT in this challenge by my girls…my name became a cuss word! “That Kali!” or “That Kiwi!” LOL
I’m “cheating”…because I wrote this a while ago and then edited it for publishing on my Words on Wings site. I still want some of the same things…and though I’m sure there are some other things I could add…I’m going to save that for the future “him” to fill in.
i think of you all the time. when i see lovers, i see us. when i see babies…i see ours. i think of the man who won’t ever need prompting to love me. the man who will never need to be reminded that i am his and he, mine. we will love, laugh, live, teach, learn, cry, sleep, dream, be…in tandem. no “mine” or “yours” just OUR…us…we…mr. and mrs. wonderful 😉
i know that you will understand my most sensitive needs…and never make me feel criminal for being so. i know you will remember all of the things i tell you…and present them to me in surprises. i know you will feel my heart beating…even when we’re in separate spaces. i know you will sense my despair…and throw on your lover’s cape, swoop in…and love me back to my glory. you’ll never see my weaknesses as weaknesses…just moments where a little more lovin’ is required. you’ll know, like i know…that there is never a moment when we no longer need to “prove” our love to each other…because the desire to show love will be a joy. you will know me…like no other.
for all that you are to me…i will be to you what shine is to sun. you will have a rib AND a spine in me. your dreams will be as important to me as they are to you…because i’ll know that when YOU’RE happy…so am i. you will know that, even though i CAN assemble a piece of furniture…i’ll let you get bragging rights *lol*. i will give you all of me…knowing that you’ll relish in the ownership. i’ll be letting all within sniffing range know…who daddy is. in turn…i will never have to be concerned about others…for my name is written in flames of love afire…right across your being. a picture of you and i will be a prized possession of yours. just as well…the love planted deeply inside of me will be as obvious as 9 months of pregnancy.
give me you and i’ll give you me…i want the good, bad, ugly, indifferent, the shit and the blossoms. i want to be your BEST friend. don’t hide from me. lay naked for me, trusting me with your vulnerability. we’ll be enough for each other…needing no one else to confide in or lean on. let’s be a force. a power of love unparalleled. let’s be…the couple lovers love and haters hate. let’s be the ones that bring love back…fuck sexy (even though we’ll make that over, too)
um, i snore…i can be a tad OCD. i like cuddling, but i need my space. i love the food network (let’s get 2 tv’s), i want a cat named Wasabi (don’t forget to bring home the allergy meds). i’m not “scared” of spiders…but they unnerve me. i AM scared of snakes (not yours, lol). i’m silly as FUCK…but, you’ll love it. i’m a word whore…so be prepared to play scrabble…and get pummeled. hehe. i need sheets over me…even in the hot ass summer…so no blanket hogging. i like to kiss your chin, so don’t deny me…i AM gonna eat your neck. i will enjoy just you sitting between my legs as i “sky write” across your back.
i want to go places, experience things, places…life…with you. show me what i’ve never seen…teach me what i didn’t know i needed to know. teach me you…let’s love, baby. always…
love, the pet name only you call me 🙂
Not quite sure. There’s a lot of things that could use a little tweaking. In the beginning of this truth challenge…I mentioned my fear, but I do believe that I am learning to use that fear as a barometer for my decision making. I do think that I’m getting to a point in my life that anything that I thought was hard has become easier…not EASY, but easier.
I DO think I can work on my sensitivity. Not sure how to do it though. I want to be able to shake off hurts quicker. Who wants to be a gaping wound? I know I don’t. I wish that I could find the ability to be Rick James cold to some shit. I don’t want to be so “tender”.
Being a bleeding heart is a full time, exhausting and trying job. YES, it’s a job! A thankless one at that. I’m learning to curtail my desire to help EVERYONE. Some folks LIKE wallowing in dysfunction and being the whipping boy/girl. So many people love the attention that comes with being the victim and/or being the savior. I call it the “heroic victim syndrome”. People who wear fragile capes of triumph, yet are always the ones who get hurt. I can’t imagine a life of never EVER being at fault. I try to be accountable for my place in every situation…even if it just means admitting that I did nothing in lieu of something. That’s another thing I need to work on. Discerning the act of quitting with the instinct of self-preservation. Sometimes you just have to jump ship instead of stagnantly floating amidst the debris.
So yea, those are some things I wanna work on…AM working on. Change is a core transformation. It’s a journey that begins with you and your higher power. It doesn’t happen overnight nor is it most successful when done out of expectation. REAL change is for you and shouldn’t have any roots in the need for outside validation. It is the essence of the butterfly…metamorphosis of the soul. I want to earn my wings. 🙂