The Twenty Fourth Day…

…a memorable summer day

In 2005 we had our family reunion in Myrtle Beach, SC. (Yes, it’s another family reunion recollection, but not really lol)

Well, in preparation…I had to look RIGHT. I needed to be cute. Sis and I had shopped for clothes, sandals, etc…but, the most important part of that ritual…is the hair.

Two weeks prior to the reunion, I’d colored my hair…a light brownish/blondish color. My hair is so dark with red undertones, so most colors in that blonde family come out “strawberry blonde”. Cool, no problem. Light is good…

The night before leaving…I got a relaxer. “They” say you can process after two weeks of adding color (or vice versa if you relax first then color). I felt safe. Clearly….I was not.

My mom (a cosmetologist) put the relaxer in and we washed it out like we normally would. No problem there…until I went to blow dry it.

“Mommy…I think my hair is falling out…”

She sat me in the chair and checked on it. I asked, “Is everything okay?” and my mother said convincingly, “Yea, it’s fine…it’s not a lot of hair…just a little.” In the meantime…she was behind me like “OMG!” because my hair was falling out in clumps. She didn’t want me to see how much was breaking off. She combed through it gingerly and then told me not to apply heat. To let it air dry. She then showed me the hair on the floor and I was like : O!

My mother assured me that my hair would be fine…thank GOD that I have a LOT of hair. She told me that if I’d been the average person…I’d be bald. Thankfully, it had only fallen out around the edges…well, it was broken off an inch from my scalp. I never did THAT shit again. I have some strong ass hair. Sheesh.

The next day down in Myrtle Beach, my hair got it’s life. I curled it and it came out fine. The above pic is my hair after the color began to fade.

I had another incident with my hair…read “Hurr Afire“. LOL

Hair Update

Someone should’ve warned me that being natural was a pain in the ass. It’s been over 8 years since my hair has been natural. I can’t believe that I thought this was a good idea. *fluffing puff on top of my head* …but, yea…I’m trying not to quit mid-process.

The funny thing is, that I was chemical free for a year without even meaning to be…but, the moment I definitively decided that I was going to be natural…the road got rough…literally. LOL

I decided to try only washing and air-drying for a while…to take the heat off of my hair. I wanted to see the natural texture…I’m trying to “train” it. O_O My first attempt out the gate of no heat on the mane was a couple of months ago. My girl Joy dropped off some of Ms. Jessie’s highly-touted and exorbitant “Curly Pudding”. Looks like grape pudding…smells like grape pudding.  Perhaps, because I didn’t condition my hair (automatic fail in Hair Care 101) there was no real manageability to the hair and the curly pudding failed to curl. Actually, all it did was cause my hair to be stiff and dry.  All I could do was brush it back into a ponytail or twist it on either side of my head. *Boooooo*

SO…this time around, I became proactive and preventive. I bought 2 packs of an olive oil deep conditioning treatment. I washed my hair with Motions Deep Conditioning Shampoo…and then used my conditioner for an hour under a cap (no heat). Once rinsed…I added a product my mother purchased, Organics Olive Oil, which is really a “twist and loc” cream, but it was lightweight and helped to soften my damp hair. I also used a oil-based spray called Jamaican Mango & Lime “shine-a-loc”. That helped to bring spring to my individual curls.

This is the result:

I know I have a long way to go…that, I also have to cut of a significant amount of hair to jump start my natural journey. I’m getting the hang of it though…I’ll keep you posted as promised.

Wish me locks…lol

Oh Natchel

As promised…I’m keeping you guys posted on my natural hair journey. I washed my hair tonight and decided to give you all a peek at my “wig”. 11 months relaxer-free and this is what you get…

Before the comb-through

I’m clearly channeling Chaka Khan. LOL

I used Miss Jessie’s Curly Pudding that my girl Joy gave me. I like it so far. I messed up though. I should’ve deep-conditioned my hair but I was kinda rushing. Next time I’m gonna do an olive oil deep conditioning and THEN apply the pudding.

I wore it in a ponytail the next day…had some waves…

I ended up running a blow-dryer through it the next day after work. I couldn’t take it. I need to work on managing the texture better. Eventually, with practice it will soften and my curl pattern will relax.

I’ll keep ya posted 🙂

Wash and Wear


Today I got my hair done at a salon. This is big for me. I normally do my own hair. Whether it’s relaxing, washing, etc. I’ve been relaxer-free for 10mos and today was the first time I’ve taken a pic of my hair in it’s wet state.

I THOUGHT the lady who was going to do my hair was Dominican, but she turned out to be Ecuadorian. ::pause::

I walked in, asked for the wash and set and then unfurled my ponytail, loosed my hair and sat down. She says after a few minutes into my wash, “I thought your hair was short…”. Not understanding her completely (a small language barrier) I asked, “What do you mean? …because my hair was up when I came in?” …she says, “…well, yes…but, most of the people…you know who are color[ed] have short hair…” I giggled a little and decided to hush…hoping that my silence would hush her too…it did.


When she said what she said, I asked where she was from because I know that most Dominican people KNOW the range of textures that us Black girls have…hell, their hair can be as thick and kinky as ours. When she said she was from Ecuador…I figured that she most likely only kicks it with her own folks. Another thought that came to mind was that she’s the slow cousin they only let out to do hair. Either way…she did the damn thing. *shrugging*

I wanted my hair straight for my birthday weekend (Monday is my day)…but, I’m also confident that I can rock the hair ^^^^up there. What you see there is me 10 months since my last relaxer. Not bad. Once it’s all cut out and natural root-to-tip…I will be free. 🙂

The finished product…


I’m going natural…again.

I was natural for 7yrs of my 20’s and after my hair became so much and too much to handle…I crossed back over to the “creamy crack”. 

So, here I am about to turn 38 in 9 days and I am going back to the wavy/kinky/mangled mane that is mine…naturally.

There’s no pressure from anyone, anything or any particular trend or fashion…just the reality that I am tired of burning my scalp…especially when I only do it once or twice a year anyway. No need to half-ass it…might as well go balls to the wall. 

I’ve been investigating products to use…and I’ve come up with something less expensive than what’s on the market…my KITCHEN (no pun intended).

Instead of this frou frou, chi chi bullcrap being sold online and in stores…I’m gonna go ahead and use Pantene or Motions, like I am used to…and then condition bi-monthly with olive oil and/or mayo. In between washes is where I may spend a little cash. I saw a holding wax by Beautiful Curls and decided that between them and another one called Curls…I’d pay the $10-$12 every month or two for the daily maintenance. I just don’t think it has to be that hard. Find ways to improvise. Check labels and see what the ingredients are and duplicate that at home for pennies less. MY kinda shit. lol I also plan to (from time to time) visit my Dominican chica, Jovita and let her lay my hair down 😉

I’ll try and chronicle my crawl back to natural tresses…no picture as of yet…but, I’m sure once I’m entrenched in my transformation, I’ll be more than happy to share my hair’s ack right and cain’t get right with you all.

Peace and Pomade~Kween


As I am about to do my hair…I thought back to a few things I’ve seen posted here and there and I gotta say…

I am SO sick of hair snobs. I don’t care if you’re hair is the nappiest kink, an extreme coil, a silky wave or a naturally thin straight. I don’t care if you “found” yourself one year and decided that you were tired of wearing the white woman’s crown. I don’t care if you grew up with a hair complex and think that long straight hair is the most beautiful hair. I don’t care if you’re weave-licious but wear your hair natural underneath. Do you see where I’m going? I hope so…because AGAIN…black people have found a reason to continuously separate themselves from each other. This is NOT a Spike Lee joint. This is life…and life is about appreciating our differences and various physicality. The slave mentality is NOT the desire to look white…it’s the lack of desire to embrace each OTHER. It’s the ignorance that comes with our own inner caste system which divides us from the top of our heads to the souls of our feat. The mentality begins and ends with blurred lines of self-inflicted alienation from our brethren.

I admit…I’m lazy when it comes to my hair. I hate washing my hair. I hate DOING my hair. I WILL whip it into something nice on the way out the door…but, I’m a pony tail girl any other day of the week. I once went 7 years without a perm. My hair grew like a weed on speed. I washed it, oiled it, braided it, etc…and you know what was so funny? People STILL thought my hair was a weave. Finally after years of going natural and not REALLY knowing what to do with it…I went back to the fried, dyed and laid to the side look. One chick ran her fingers through my scalp in search of tracks. *smh* I didn’t do it because I hated my natural hair. For me it was ease. I didn’t have to do crap to it but wash it and slick it back. Does that make me less than a REAL black woman…ABSOLUTELY not. Do I have a warped sense of self? NO ma’am/sir. Do I not own my “blackness”? (whatever the hell that is). Do I not still walk with kween swagger? Bitch.Boo.Bye! Check it. My hair is beautiful…in it’s natural state AND it’s “processed” state. Why? Because it is MINE…and it is a part of ME. I am not my hair, as India.Arie said. I am not my “lighter shade of skin”…I am not my “fluffy” frame…I am not my “geek status”…I am not the cheeseburgers I love…I am not my clothes, residence, or the friends I choose. I am a stand out, unequivocally GRAND design of God’s. I won’t let someone who chooses to relish in their kink, tell me that because I DON’T…somehow I’m stuck in a white woman’s world. With all of the amalgamations of genes in this world…how is anyone to define what “black hair” should look like. I know chicks who have natural hair and STILL rock wigs and weaves. No offense NOR judgment to those sistas…but, like me…they sometimes lean towards ease and variety. Is EVERY sista who wears her hair natural, confident? NOPE…because going natural doesn’t equate to cultural pride. It doesn’t mean that every insecure thought goes away. It doesn’t mean that she stops hating what she sees in the mirror…anymore than having a perm means you’re an oreo. I have friends who are natural and love it. I have FAB girls who go from the stunning shaved Ms. Tracey…to the newly natural, Dee…to Nya Papaya’s (Melissa) natural waves…and my loc’d sista Mahogany. They are as different as their choice of hair style.

Is beauty in this country warped? HELL YEA…there are barriers of beauty that are still stigmatized and perpetuated. From body shapes, to facial feature, to hair texture, to geographical origin, to height and on and on. Do they need to be debunked and put to bed? OF COURSE!! What will it take? How about start with living your own life…being at peace with who you are first…and instead of ridiculing, dismissing and harboring snobbish judgments…accept folk for who they are. If I wanna relax my hair, eat a burger and drink a Pepsi. So BE it…because I DAMN sure wont be trying to convince you to process your fro, give up tofu and wheat shakes in order to validate my own beliefs. Hell, I AM tryna put the burger down. My ass is thicker than a Frosty…lol. Yet…Between all the differences we encompass and the attitude of self-righteousness…our people are going to remain on the slow climb to unity. All because instead of worrying about my mind state…you’re concerned with my hair. Treat the mind set first…and then work on the hair, because lack of perm just means you’re nappy…not necessarily happy.

Shit…I’m tender-headed ANY damn way. And I’m TIDE!

Shout-outs to my natural beauties…Almondie, B-Cup, Blossom, Yesha, Letrice, Sun Ree, Twin, Aly Boo, Cousins Shelley & SheRah/Megan & Kaitlyn, Starrdusstt, Sonja…and my mommy! 🙂

Hurr AFIRE!!: My Michael Jackson Moment


Someone bestow the “JACKASS of the Year” award to *drumroll* KWEEN KIWI! Why? Well, because I caught my hair on fire dammit!!

What had happened was…I woke up about 40 minutes before 1:20ish…to some STANKNESS! First, I heard a small yelp…then I smelled the funk. Yep…those EFFIN skunks that took up residence near my house in our yard, sprayed some dumbass stray animal. So, since Pepe LePew did his job “protecting” the yard I got up to light an incense. Well, I’ve been scatterbrained lately…ya girl is holding said lit incense in hand (I hadn’t even blown out the shit yet) and decides at the same time to scratch her head (all while ruing the fact that I didn’t buy more of these particular incense sticks). All of a sudden…I hear a WOOSH! (the sound of a BBQ fire being lit) and I realize OH SHIT! So, I began patting out my hurr (while yelling HEE HEE…ok, I’m fudging it) but yea…I pat the hurr and feel okay that I’ve put it out. I actually am STILL holding the incense stick, so I place it in the incense holder. I step in the bathroom, which is right by my room…and look at my hair. It’s not that bad…but, I can see the singe. My hair was brushed back and then then held up inside of a clip…so the tip of the hair caught fire as well as the front. I just took it out, combed it and clipped it back. LMAOO

I WILL be washing my hair tomorrow to get rid of the smell of burned hair, praying to GOD that it all doesn’t come out in the wash. LOL

At least I managed to get rid of the skunk smell…I just replaced it with the new scent “HURR AFIRE” *takes ass back to bed*

Hair ya go!

I am getting my hair done on Monday…and I’ve made up my mind that I’m cutting it. I just don’t know how short or in what style. I’ve had long hair for the past 12-13 years. It started when I stopped perming it in 1994. It grew like weeds. It was SO thick and long that when I decided to perm it again in 2001, I had a bad habit of rolling over on it and yanking my head in the middle of the night when attempting to get up! lol 

I remember the day I came home from my mother’s house from having it done, my ex who rarely saw the length of my hair (from me keeping it braided, twisted or ponytailed) was amazed at the length. I even had a tacky broad run her fingers through my scalp in search of tracks. *hater* HA! 

I then began cutting on it. In 2005 I dyed it blonde only for the shit to fall out (I was cutting the recommended 2 week waiting time close). Luckily for me, I have about 2-3 strands of her per shaft and what might have been someone else’s HEAD of hair, was only half of mine. I then got  about 5″ cut off in 2007 to preserve it, because it was so damaged. NOW, I’m just sick of wearing it in a ponytail. The only problem is, that long hair is safe. (For ME anyway)…I mean, you have the option to put it up when you don’t feel like being bothered, unlike short hair that needs to be maintained in it’s style. I envision an above the shoulder bob that I can style in big curls. ESPECIALLY once I dye it fiery red. I am trying to redefine my look. Last time I tried to dye red, it just didn’t take. This time I KNOW I need a FIRE engine red…AND 2 boxes! It’s on and popping! Oooooh, I can’t wait. Yall ain’t gonna be able to tell me NUFFIN!!