Damn, Ladies…

Women Unite!!!

…or maybe not.

Why is that though? Why is it that women PERIOD seem so easily pushed to turn on one another. It doesn’t take much at all. The moment a woman leaves the room, something negative is uttered. A woman sees a confident woman doing what makes HER happy…out comes the claws.

I’ve never seen such meanness. I see so much side-eyeing, side-swiping, side-talking on a daily basis. In my Facebook feed, my Twitter timeline, my tumblr dashboard, my office, the store, reality TV…GEEZ la-fuggin-WEEZ!

I can’t even say it’s all about men, either. I’ve seen chicks hate each other for simple looks. “She thinks she’s this…” …whether that be her thinking she’s cute, smart, sexy, whatever…I see it.

WHY can’t a woman just look at another woman who is doing her thing and quite possibly succeeding at it…and give her kudos? And MEAN it? Why is it so hard for women to be honest with each other?

Has society pitted us against each other with it’s views of beauty and worthiness? Have we been indoctrinated over the years with superficial peeves about each other? Hair, clothes, weight, skin color…MEN? Yes, SOME of the issues are about men and the attention level one may get over the other.

If I see a woman doing something productive, making her life count for something and being a positive force…I can’t hate her. I love her grind. I love her determination and if I’m not doing what I feel I should be doing, I pray that she’ll inspire me. No, everyone doesn’t have to be inspired  Hell…if you seriously have a reason to dislike or hate…then do you, but why must that be the only thing you have to offer? If I don’t like someone, I just don’t deal. I don’t care if she’s the average Jane or if she’s a celebrity. I seriously don’t like much of Nicki Minaj’s works. Rather than [at any given opportunity] go in on how good she’s NOT…I just don’t listen to her music. I don’t entertain her interviews. There’s no need for me to hold a hate campaign against her. If anything…I respect her carving out a place in the industry for herself.

I refuse to succumb to the title of a “crab in a barrel” by hissing in her direction or any OTHER female I may not care for. It’s not to say you can’t have an opinion, Ladies…but, why does it HAVE to include a hateful lambasting of “that bitch” that you PROBABLY don’t even KNOW well enough to have an opinion on? How do you arrive at a conclusion about any person you’ve never held a conversation with? That to me is a problem and it’s a seemingly BIGGER problem among my very own people. Yes, Black women…I’ve seen some HATEFUL ass comments about each other online. No sense of respect, boundary or basic loyalty to a caste of people who severely need to be unified. Nope…just crazy, insane, nonsensical hate and bitterness toward one another.

This HAS to stop!!

…but, HOW? Where does it begin? Does it begin with saying nice things in lieu of judgments? Does it come with changing the way you speak to people (changing the attitude and being less offensive/defensive)? Where do we begin? How do we pass on love, respect, peace and a sense of community love in place of hate, disdain, envy and division?

I don’t know. For ME, it’s checking mySELF. I rarely have a catty thought anymore. I used to have one from time to time, but those are far and few between. Nowadays, if I find myself rolling my eyes at you…I’ve truly come to that feeling by way of observing you or getting to know you…and even THEN, I don’t feel strongly enough to talk badly about you or wish you ill. Even when people have left my circle…I still send love their way. Why do anything else? Does it benefit ME to be a bitch and be a self-proclaimed warning signal that says, “I’M A BAD BITCH…BEWARE!”? Sure doesn’t. I refuse to sully my overall energy with that kind of negative brashness.

Please ladies…PLEASE consider how you speak. How you perceive each other. How you treat each other. Women are beautiful in so many ways and we must celebrate that in each other daily. Anything else is a crime.

Come out of the litter boxes, damnit! LOL

Don’t Make NO Sense!

I watched Rosewood again this morning. I was SO mad when Esther Rolle got killed on her porch…for telling the TRUTH! They knew GOOD and well that woman hadn’t been raped…but rather than admit she was a lying whore…they torched homes, hung families…including women and children all for the “precious honor” of Fannie Taylor.

I saw this movie when it came onto VHS (yes, I rented it, lol) and I just remember being upset and crying at the animalism. The joy they took in killing “negras” and searching for the non-existent rapist. In spite of the fools that led the lynch party…there were a few who refused to be roped (no pun intended) into killing innocent folks on a foolish rampage of imaginary justice. John Wright, played by John Voight (Angelina Jolie’s father) was the merchant who helped hide some of the Rosewood survivors fleeing from imminent death in January 1923…and secured a train ride to Gainsville. 

Rosewood was a majorly Black/Seminole Indian populated town that had a thriving community where the families owned their own homes and businesses. They were upstanding citizens who were hunted down like wild dogs to satisfy the lie of a woman afraid to tell her husband the truth. As I watched this movie for what has to have been the 4th or 5th time…I looked at how disgusting hate can be. How ironic it was, to have them refer to Black folks as less than human, when it was THEM who displayed the ways of inhumanity. Barbecuing, dismembering and maiming the bodies of lynched and burnt men and women…ugh.

Anyway, I saw this movie and it had my spirit unsettled for a few. I’m ok now…but, I had to let it out. I think in a way, a part of me questions how much of that hate has REALLY dissipated. How just because we’re not being physically lynched, burned and killed…doesn’t change the fact that there are still hatemongers amongst us with the same mentality. The lynching has turned into false imprisonment and unnecessary brutality. The burning is something like rights being violated…and the killing? Well, they’re still doing that…they’re just finding ways to call it justified.

Don’t make NO sense!!