7~ Deep As A Puddle

Have you ever been deeply in love? Explain

Yes…and no.

I was deeply in love with my first. The kind of love that could close out the other people in a crowded room. Often, people would disperse slowly to our oblivion and we’d find ourselves alone in a room loud with our stares and smiles. (I wonder if he remembers that the way I do) Either way, we were a synchronized rhythm of learning, giggles and touch…and I felt like I’d always be in love with him…

I was deeply in love with my ex of 8 1/2 yrs. The one with whom I had an abusive relationship. In the beginning and at the end…things were the most tender. The way he wouldn’t let go at night while we slept and how I awoke often to him staring at me (not as creepy as it sounds). How he’d kiss me awake…and take care of me when I was sick. We laughed at almost everything and honestly, we had a very psychic relationship. I have stories of him hearing my thoughts and him SWEARING I was talking when I knew I hadn’t opened my mouth. I was in love, until I realized that love doesn’t hurt…

I was deeply in love with the radio dude. His voice was medicine for whatever ailed me and I just knew that his love would always be there. Silly as hell…we laughed many a night away when our asses should’ve been asleep. He challenged me to grow past my self-induced lines and fears. Mainly due to him, I became less shy and eventually had my own short-lived show online. Our decidedly different views on life, love, family and friendship…always seemed to come together. He the wings, me the anchor…and often switching roles when necessary. Younger than me chronologically…I often felt like he was older, hence my name for him “Papa Pea”(see, two peas in a  pod). I was in love…until I realized that love don’t lie.

As far as I’m concerned, I’ve been deepest in love with them all for different reasons. They all represented different phases of my spiritual understanding. I was in love for the first time, the worst time and the most recent time…with all I had. I’ve never given less.  Some might say that I couldn’t have been deeply in love so many times…but, I believe that my blessing to love others is the most beautiful and deepest thing about me…

3 thoughts on “7~ Deep As A Puddle

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s